It would seem I have an addictive personality. That is to say I am prone to getting addicted to things. Not that my personality is addictive. Like chocolate. Or nicotine. That would be a bit of a pretentious opener, wouldn't you say? Although, some might say that even having to explain the difference makes me a tad conceited.
Either way, I'm sure I could rattle off a much larger list of things I have been addicted to than the list of things that have been addicted to me - and I've been addicted to things that are not particularly appealing or good for me. Like smoking. Procrastination. And relationships with jobless, homeless, emotionally unstable, financially retarded, educationally challenged... oops sorry, where was I?
Brownies (I'm great at these TEEL paragraphs). It's my latest addiction. The reason for this post. And not because I think you need to hear about my love affair with their chocolately goodness. But because I need a distraction from them. They are consuming me. And I want to be consuming them. It all began last weekend... [insert dreamy flashback music and a little haze].
The Friday before last I was informed that our office would be having morning tea for a colleague (and friend) who was having a birthday. As excited as I was, I got a little anxious when I realised this friend had a gluten intolerance, which meant if I didn't want her throwing up on her birthday it might be a nice idea to cook something gluten free (because everything I've ever bought that is gluten free has tasted like crap). And so began my experimentation with cooking gluten free brownies.
The first batch was amazing. I had no idea gluten free could taste so good! I was so excited that I had decided to experiment before hand. It meant the whole batch could be consumed by myself and my (not so) mini-me. We were hooked.
The second batch was cooked mid week in preparation for a house in weekend craziness. The recipe said they would keep for three to four days. I thought I would test the theory on Wednesday, see if they were still edible by Saturday, and if they were I could create the real batch before taking all of the furniture out of my house (my mission for that weekend). Unfortunately, as you may well guess, there were none left by Saturday and so I could not test the theory.
The third batch was cooked on Sunday amidst the household schmozzle - ready for the party on Monday. They went rock hard. I'm not sure what I missed. I didn't cook them as long. But the were certainly not fit for sharing with my peers. And so we (and by we I mean mainly the neighbourhood kids who apparently never get fed) ate the lot.
The fourth, fifth, and yes, sixth batches also came out of Sunday. Here I was thinking that there wouldn't be time or space for cooking for the party. But as it turned out I got all the furniture out of the whole house in one day and was left with four rooms completely void of entertainment, seating or even bedding; two rooms packed to the brim and un-walk-through-able; and a fully working kitchen. In fact apart from the practice brownie cooking, this may have been the first time the functionality of the kitchen actually called to me. It said "you've got nothing else to do now - you may as well use me". And I did.
I think I took two batches to school on Monday. I'm not sure if, like cigarettes, they taste like shit, and I'm so lost in the delusion that I can't live without them, or if there were more there than I thought. But I had a couple for breakfast, a few at our morning tea. One with lunch. Some after school. And was still picking on them today. I get the feeling I'm the only one eating them. But I can't stop.
I know there are still more at school. Waiting for me for breakfast tomorrow. But before I starting writing this post I cooked another batch. I know. I have a problem. But I just can't stop. And this blog entry is nearly over. And I just know... that the minute I stop writing... I'm going to fill... my belly... to the point of bursting... on those delicious... gluten free... chocolately... sugary... gooey... but crunchy.. yummmmmmmmy... brownies.
HELP!
